Dude. I haven't taken a shit in a week.
Try anal, it works wonders.
I just had the fat girl at the party come tell me I look sad and offer me a beer. I'm out.
Just finished my law exam. Questions 4-18 seemed to pertain specifically to things we've done this semester.
It's hard to believe so much cum came out of such a small penis.
BEER BONG IN THE STOCKROOM COME IN TO WORK TODAY
Do you have any idea how hard it is to concentrate on legal issues with the ghost of his giant penis in me?
Its a "sake bomb in the bathroom during class" kind of day.
My favorite bartender added me on Facebook. Now he can clearly see how under 21 I am
She failed the Charleston discretion test, although puking in her armpit was very innovative.
This is the I'm sorry text for running around yelling don't shit on my rainbow, end up in the fetal position crying at 4 am in my car because someone shit on my rainbow
He was just lying in his underwear like a present. I had to unwrap it.
dude girls our age are getting married and having babies and I still can't figure out how to defrost my hotpockets
My parents are paying for my knee surgery for my birthday. What costume will look good on crutches for my Halloween Birthday?
Welcome to adulthood.
Do you remember punching the light out in the bathroom? I didn't, and that was at bar 2 of 4…
I’m not dating him for his personality. I’m dating him so I can steal his dog.
Randomize
