we were holding hands throwing up into the same garbage can; if thats not true love i dont know what is .
I checked into jail on foursquare
Contrary to what I yelled at them last night, it turns out campus police CAN arrest people...
The best was having to tell my 16y/o cuz and her bf that we could see him fingering her in the inner tube. Lucky for them, I'm the cool cousin... and was river-level fuckedup.
Oh god. It's my first day here, I'm still drunk and somebody just drifted in a forklift. I'm going to die.
No... We were arguing over whose family is more dysfunctional... Then my brother stumbled in and puked all over jakes ugly dog.
We've shared an experience, my friend. I, too, have talked on the phone with a parent while giving a handjob
Chelsea passed out in the kiddie pool. Just added around 28 boxes of jello powder. Will let you know how it works out
I believe you called it tequila and nipples. The proceeded to strike a pose.
Let's just say he sent me a picture of his dick and I was more impressed with the collection of video games he had in the background...
There must be a happy medium universe where you get it on with my girlfriend enough to cause me pain but not a full on cardiac arrest. It's a fine line to tread though.
Waking up in a NH rest stop and reading through my texts is definitely a familiar low
Did you get any pics? And I can only imagine how inferior you must have felt knowing that somewhere in that room was a guy whose penis was the length of your forearm.
My car has a permanent smell of sex to it now.
Angels sing when his face is between my thighs. I came 3 times before he even came up for air.
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