so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
like i told you yesterday: virgins, blood, my name. do it.
So...it's hour 4 of day 5 of week 7 of my internship, and so far all ive done is shred paper. all. day. long. it's like working for Enron.
It was her 21st and she had one drink and fell asleep. I hate 90lb girls.
how did he go about obtaining bull sperm?
I don't remember how we paid for the cab. I do however remember giving him my heels 2 help with the bill.
I think I just accidentally agreed to become a surrogate for a gay couple
He said he was going to "rock my world". I wonder if he too has a false sense of confidence and accomplishment stemming from a complete lack of honesty from our own female counterparts.
In order of importance: Where am I? Where's my car? Where are my clothes? Who is this chick in the room?
Anne's couch, the bar, your car, Anne.
if creating a fake 8 year old brother, who lives with me and has had mono for the past month, to explain why I have ignored my group project members is wrong, then I... well then I'm probably going to hell
Let's be honest, your relationships fail because the man you're looking for is the equivalent of an intellectual blow-up doll.
I just found out the guy that lied and blew me off got arrested, his mugshot is online. Life is good.
I think after 8 tries we can say Stoli Thursdays cause too much damage.
I wonder what dick looks like without astigmatism?
The dominatrix coworker is currently listening to pop music that has been translated into an Irish dialect and sung by high school kids. Every day gets weirder here.
Randomize
