He proposed that we "bone". I've completely given up on boys.
She was so happy she found her sunglasses, that she blew me. Im now randomly hiding things of hers in hopes she'll find them and I'll get a repeat performance.
this is never going to happen for me, I think he thinks I'm crazy
well you did scream "PLEASE! I'LL S YOUR D IN FRONT OF EVERYONE"
I need to keep friends like you around just in case hell grades on a curve.
These Attractive Criminals Took Sexy Mugshots That Made Them Famous
Are you being sarcastic? I can't tell this time because you're in the hospital.
The cops walked in to class and arrested 2 guys for possession.
I am ina trunk. Iam in a trunnnnnjkk. I hope its yours. Oh manomanomano. Thids better be your trunk
I can dry shave vagina like a champ
Everyone here knows my boyfriend as "Half Baked". Life, he's doing it right.
This Girl’s Unbelievable Catfish Story Will Make You Rethink Online Dating
wtf... you literally introduced yourself as "that friend who's going to fuck all your other friends."
I hope you know that means regardless of their gender.
Long story short I'm making an I'm sorry card for a girl I dont remember having sex with
You woke up butt naked, peed yourself said something about jumbo shrimp, and passed back out 10 seconds ltr..
I don't need no damn man when I have the cock-a-nator 2000.
You're the only person I know who would go to New Jersey to give a blowjob and I have so much respect for you for it
Nothing like a near-death experience to start off your Thanksgiving...