It smelt so bad when i tried biting off her underwear that i didn't want to touch with my mouth
Literally just as i started to cum the church bells next ot my house began to ring. either it was the most epic timing ever or god was watching and congratulating me
headbutted the bartender, tried to bite the bouncer, and pissed on a cops shoes. and i still got laid. god, it's good to be home
I just found out I was conceived in a rehab facility... that's better than finding out your dad could be someone else right?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you're in nursing school, now tell me what to do about a burned clit.
APPARENTLY giving your friend one of your shoes so that you avoid the no shoes no service rule makes you drunk...
I learned an important lesson this weekend.... I'm way to good at sex to travel for it. From now on he drives here...
When the officer tried to stop you, you just shouted your name in his face. repeatedly.
If your wondering where your blanket is, I put it on the 2 guys you brought home last night. Their still sleeping outside on the trampoline.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also, drinking coors light. Fuck that. Fuck that in the fucking face.
Its so bad though\nOur relationship has gotten to the point where im posing nude with a swiffer
he'll always be the guy that i fucked on the bathroom floor
I m a li title tea p or short and sto u. T.... Here is my haaandley
C ANGT CATCH NE IM THE GIBNGER BREAS MAB
Just remember: We don't tell our English professor about our fetishes unless she specifically asks about them.
I don't wanna see it, I don't wanna touch it, I just want it in me.
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