sooooo how many boyfriends is too many?
I'll never ask another girl to get on top again, that girl from the bar last night got on top and shit diareah all over my ball sack while she was cumming.
Sometimes when I see a shoe on the side of the road, I get a little depressed that I've never partied that hard.
We legit stopped the the game so that Jamie and I could throw up in the bushes, and then continue to play intramurals... this is what my life is coming to1
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There's a mechanical bull in the basement dude where are you
Also, my aunt grabbed my phone and downloaded the scriptures. Apparently I need Jesus.
It's official. Those are now your come fuck me flipflops
like stop just cause your whole life has been one enormous reject pile does not mean that i have to suffer too
U touched your head and and said "oh look blood" and then looked at me and touched my face... And said war paint
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
YOU IS KIND. YOU IS SMART. YOU IS IMPORTANT. YOU IS CLEANING YOUR OWN VOMIT.
I woke up naked buried in snacks. Best night ever.
BRING KITTENS I AM A GENIUS
I'm recovering from the blowjob...She's doing her taxes...
i guess "never drinking again" is not an option when you invent a whole new level of drunk...
I'm totally picking out my shrooming outfit and blankets right now
Randomize