I swear she didn't look like that last week.
Maybe you should have studied instead of worrying about who is going to have sex with you
Gross thing of the day...i got cum in my new boots
i used the pictures of vaginas in your biology book to jack off.
You broke out your mechano set and told us you were gonna "build us a beer machine" and 5 min later you were fast asleep
Watching crazy stupid love and drinking alone isn't what I thought it was gonna be
Its TONS better. Expect a drunk dial at 11:54
He pulled out, and the resulting cumstain on my sheets is in the shape of a fetus. The irony of this is both awesome and terrifying.
I think drinking everclear was a better idea than taking a night class.
I seriously want to say to him "Do you know how many blow jobs you could have gotten this summer?"
I just sat on the floor of my shower for 20 minutes to punish myself for drunk me's decisions.
Just once I'd like to go out and not have to tell you to put your pants back on.
There's a 50-50 shot that I will wake up with an ass tattoo tomorrow.
It's like if you wanna bond just do a ropes course or have group sex you don't have to be weird about it
the only fun thing to do here is drink beer and make mistakes. i feel like im in college again
Well the grass always *looks* greener on the other side but sometimes that’s bc there’s a sewage runoff...
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