I don't even have to turn the heat on in my car. Just fart the whole way home.
But why is there no point in liking him? Does he have herpes? Is he married? Is he gay? Did he get his penis chopped off in a freak accident? If the answer is no to all of the above, then he is fair game
My suggestion that we all just smoke some weed was greeted with a uncomfrotable silence and a 'maybe later'. These are not our people
Its not personal, its just business. I'm the Donald Trump of blowjobs.
she crawled under her car and passed out. Unfortunately her feet were sticking out and someone called 911 because they thought she had been run over.
of course not. I do my best teaching on a hungover monday. I did the research. im still okay with the direction in which my life is headed.
Sorry I invoked the "everyones getting smacked including myself policy last night"
Lmfao I'm not trying to have a pissing contest over acid with my mom.....
by the way whatever wisdom you imparted upon me last night was lost to whatever i smoked out of a beer can.
your phone died, so you started bawling in the bar
yeah that sounds like me
She's blowing me while I'm watching air jaws. I love shark week.
I only spent $42 at the bar last night, it's some sort of miracle.
you do remember it was dollar beer night, right?
That answers my next five questions
I just masturbated at work... Don't know why but I thought you should know
I'm still drunk, my mom is throwing up, and there is a random Irish guy out getting our house breakfast right now. Wednesday's are my bitch.
The covid immunization shot lady also sold me a mondo bag of really good pot.
Randomize
