dude, the reading rainbow guy was just talking to a HOLOGRAM
Are you sure you're not watching Star Trek?
wait... oh
i also saw a trio of peacocks walking along a sidewalk in hollywood today. i really hope im not tripping.
how am i supposed to spank it to a shakira video when she looks like she is doing the robot?
Do you remember peeing on the wall and then yelling at us to stop looking at your dick?
You told me you were pretty sure you were god because you knew everything about everyone.
I mean I like that it's warm enough to open the windows, but it annoys me that I can't walk around naked anymore.
If it's any consolation, your boobs looked awesome.
nope im down the street in my car watching the front of her house. its actually less creepy than it sounds
I elbow dropped a bag of ice to break it so we could make margaritas. I bled everywhere. Be proud.
Are the homeless actually allowed to bathe in fountains located on Main Street in downtown Houston? Can Houston TX be so progressive as to condone public bathing?
Just discovered i ordered the nhl center ice package back in september, the operator said there was a note next to the time I called, indicating I may have been intoxicated while calling (no clue why but it was noted)...meaning I was drunk...meaning ill never miss another sabres game...i love me and am beaming with self pride
See what happens when I don't get laid? I make poor life decisions, like buying baby ducks.
Sorry, i'm on a strict diet of vodka and regret
Just saw 4 of my students at Denny's at 4am on a Tuesday. We all pretended not to see each other, as we are all clearly tipsy and/or stoned. Class is in less than 4 hours. Either i'm getting too old for this shit or they're starting on the road to crazy-town much earlier these days.
Woke up went to work ate beef after three year hiatus shat my pants went to bed
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