these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
I just spit my fake tooth out at a customer. I think he thought it was my bubble gum though so it's ok.
everytime she opens her mouth i wish that i was deaf
I was. I was trying to blow bubbles in the toilet after I threw up in it. They had to carry me everywhere. I lost a sock.
We did it and he fell asleep and I was bored so I decided to go back to the party...is that bad?
omg. if hes just gonna get mad everytime i have sex with one of his "friends" then it was never gonna work out
I made weed fried chicken. What have you done today?
I've created a drink called, "watching the sound of music with grandma." its straight vodka
Dude, all I remember was you grabbing random girls, yelling "It's a rap video!" and pouring high-life on them.
My goal for break? Fuck all my exes in reverse order.
It might have taken me 30 minutes but I finally finished the toast I made. That hungover.
I'm drinking with a guy who is a bigger asshole than me. We started a contest.
I got about 15 snapchats from you with your hand saying "you want cheese sticks" or something like that and one of some weird looking weed
New drinking game idea: Take a shot for every republican you see on facebook bitching about the ruling.
Probably some sort of karmic revenge for me looking at titties somewhere along the way
and for that you shall suffer
God: I won't strike you down, but I shall introduce your child to Doja Cat during a quarantine
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