Dude, TWO hot chicks on jeopardy tonight. gonna be a good one
Dude, I am so turned on right now. Hot chick with glasses from brooklyn is absolutely crushing right now, taking whole categories. might beat off to jeapordy...
do another line during during the commercial and make the magic happen during double jeopardy.
do u think i could put an abortion on my debit card?
i think he just uses that whole "grew up in a castle" thing to get pussy
My Mom bought me a vibrating toothbrush. Maybe this is her way of apologizing for throwing away my other thing that vibrated.
My spanish teacher discovered you can watch spanish music videos on youtube. Guess what were doing in class today? Michael Scott Spanish 101
We argued about the championship during sex. Absolutely the manliest moment of my life.
may have given a homeless man 70 dollars in exchange for his sandals. so yea, i'm going as jesus for next halloween.
What the fuck am I going to do with a pinata full of tampons?
she is legit wearing a plastic bag around her neck as a necklace. she says it serves two purposes.
I'm going to try to ignore the homoerotic subtext in that last question...
Today wasn't Sunday Funday, it was more like Sunday god is taking a shit on my life day
Wait also totally unrelated but can horses sit down?
I just tried to picture one and I don't think they can cause I can't envision it
I have a present for you
Like a legit gift, not just me showing up and getting naked
She wasn't one for labels or anything serious really but while she was riding me she yelled marry me. It's like she fucked her self into commitment lmao she realy is a keeper bro
You know you've been having sex for 9 months when you do Rock Paper Scissors for who has to go on top
Randomize