ur dog is so gonna tell on us one day.
for doing what?
for smoking bowls out on the deck while your parents aren't home.
I think most guys look at porn as a fallback career. I mean I know I do.
He said hes taking shrooms and watching jurassic park so we're making a t-rex costume
we need ur ladder
Be prepared to possibly be invited to a fancy strip club breakfast on Friday and be prepared to say yes.
Am I the only one that feels like there are hundreds of tiny people having a rave and stomping and kicking around inside my head this morning?
This summer isn't about fun. We have to train our livers to survive the next four years.
No, this place just freaks me out. Like I feel like ill get pregnant just being here. And all those pregnant bellies. It's weird.
I am coping with the snow storm with beer and shots of jack. If I were outside in shorts I might be able to pass as a Canadian.
I felt like a personal hot pocket and all I could taste was cigarettes.
It's like God tapped him on the shoulder and said "You are now capable of giving world shattering, tear jerking head."
The Vicodin is in the strawberries.
This feels more like a conference of all the people I've fucked in the past year.
sorry i was ignoring you last night i accidentally did a bunch of pcp and thought i was inside tron
Why are you hurting?
Tried to drink all the beer in Nashville last night....failed.
It went from a "chill game of beer pong" to "absinthe body shots and a tits parade" in literally two minutes.
Told you inviting her was a good idea.
Randomize
