Since my computer broke, i've been masterbating to girls gone wild. I feel like i'm in the 90's.
his penis was like watching paranormal activity your very hyped up to see it but you think it might be very scary and in the end you didnt really see anything at all
I want to make a porn site called "girls with daddy issues"
You tried to pay the bartender in graduation checks, I think you'll be fine in the real world.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I HAVE stop dating guys for their prescriptions, you have no idea how awkward family dinner was. Thank god for his xanax.
I did the mature thing and subtweeted that bitch. She follows me so she'll see.
so as he was cumming he sort of growled with one eye squinted... for a moment there I thought I was fucking Popeye
I was gonna jerk off, but then I thought about that movie last night and it killed that idea. I have serious boner trauma.
I shit like a lady though so that rarely happens
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Random boy motorboated me, handed me a business card congratulating me on my motorboat, winked and walked out with some other girl
Find him and marry him.
Last night you were prentending to be a broom stick...you were laying on the floor and humming the Harry potter song.
Here's the thing. Kinda drunk. Eating leftover soup. In bed. Watching Disney channel.
The closest thing I've had to an orgasm lately is sneezing nonstop from fucking allergies.
I think he just shit his pants. Yep he did. That's unfortunate.
I was just seen throwin up on the bookstore building near a trashcan by parents. Naturally I throw a thumbs up and say go college
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