Guys who wear capris make me want to kill endangered species.
Guess who's still drunk but on time to court to represent a DUI?
You are my hero
can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
I swear to god he's a one man village people.
judging by the mobile uploads you added of me last night, we cant keep living this way.
Itd be nice if there was a level of interest in me somewhere in between the indifference and obsession that I've only been attracting
And then I remembered we banged to Beethoven & I was like you will never get this ass again
I woke up with gum stuck to my nipple piercings this morning.. So there's that.
He deserves someone who will touch his penis at 3 a.m.
My cat just smacked my blunt from my hand and then put her head in my hand. I don't know how to feel
I mean, we were all drinking, but I'm pretty sure kidnapping came up.
I was really excited when I saw a billboard for neverbethirsty.org this morning. Then I realized it was for a church.
Stoner thoughts are the only thoughts I want to have now.
I got a gay guy to motorboat me. These tits could change the world, I'm telling you.
is it sad that the highlight of my saturday night was waiting till 3 in the morning to hear about your saturday night?
Randomize
