I wish there was some sort of "recently added" function for blackberrys so i could see what random numbers i got from the night before
he asked me to have sex with him by saying 'take one for the team'. so no we didn't do it.
Mmmhmmm sure, nice try, but there's certain wounds that only bj's can heal
Hey do you want me to wrap up that Jack in the Box you left in my gutter
Come over, I want to eat cookie dough off your dick.
No teenage boy ever gets scared away from sex unless she is slipping a wedding ring on your finger or is killing your cat. I promise.
I can't go to class, I have all this weed to sell
They're either celebrating their tax money or trying to kill each other.
It's not a walk of shame if you run
We are the rockettes of vaginal bleeding
I FUCKED WHEELCHAIR DUDE
HE'S INTO WEIRD SHIT
GOOD KIND OF WEIRD SHIT
I just want him to make us coffee. And whack off into the sunset
I have photo proof.
Girl, don't care. What's my rule? If I don't remember it, it never happened.
I canceled a date last night to eat pop tarts and go to bed early
I didn’t want a minivan, but I have to admit it’s made it a lot easier to hook up with the dilfs at soccer tournaments
Randomize
