just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
It made me feel like I need a reality show of my life so I could go back and watch the episodes to figure out how I got from the trunk of the car to my neighbors tree house...
Despite what happened tonight, Im still expecting Jesus birthday sex
sticking your hands in the toilet to wash your face is not acceptable. ever. i don't care how drunk you are.
I'm not really sure what went on in my mouth last night but right now it tastes like what I can only imagine is a mixture of astroglide and peanut butter. You hungry?
Just made a list of all the guys I've hooked up with. "Roofie tattoo eyelids", "xanex night guy", "rainy concert", "cory blanket" and "naked hottub guy" made it.
I generally just try to vote by which candidate I think has the bigger dick. Sorry Romney.
feelin groggy baby? need a coffee? vitamins? a nice good fuck on the piano?
somebody went from crying while watching Full House, to a full on emotional raging bull...I love this time of the month
I ate the crust off the pizza and left the rest in the box. Even I would hate me.
I'm still a bit day drunk and decided to go for a run. You may get a snapchat of me vomiting soon
Should I take a fireball shot or brush my teeth?
He has great taste in girls. I feel closer to my Eskimo sisters than my real sister...
I dipped out before he woke up, but I made sure to take the pizza with me.
Was I just dreaming, or was there a corpse at work last night?
She was just sleeping.
Is it bad that I'm kind of disappointed by that?
Randomize
