So today I found out that our school is known as the herpes school
Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
It was kinda bitchy last night when i brought up my pregnancy scare and you said "shotty playing with it"
Operation Purity has been aborted
We just saw him running from campus police a few minutes ago. So no, I don't think he's still passed out on the quad.
You kept telling the cops that our ice luge was practice for the next winter olympics
Found: medium sized pair of mens pants tucked inside my purse w/ a dry cleaners coupon in left pocket. Call if you wish to claim the coupon
The floor and the wall just switched. I'm falling.
I know shes my ex. And I know she punched me in the face and stole my car to go get drunk. But it's the best sex I've ever had.
You're sick. Take pictures if you can.
His voice is like having sex with hot chocolate and then suddenly you're pregnant.
So good news, aparently I blacked out and tried to go in the back of the mcdonalds to thank the people for makin my fries
ERIN AND I ARE GETTING MATCHING VIBRATORS. I'M PEER PRESSURING YOU INTO JOINING THE CLUB. Besides we're the three best friends that anyone could have, you better not ruin that by being a pussy and not treating your pussy to awesomeness. That is all.
he just fluffed my hair and told me I had to dance with him because we were both gingers.
Fly, little bird! Repopulate the ginger race!
He was standing in the living room wearing a Donald Trump wig and looking very disappointed
Periods are much less exciting when you're not sexually active.
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