doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
Yeah I'm pretty sure at one point I was telling her to keep her dick in her pants. She was going to do some serious damage.
Are you seriously drinking already? It's 11AM. Still morning.
I'm going by McDonald's time. And since they stop serving breakfast at 10:30 and start serving lunch, it is now afternoon.
I probably should have cut it off when he started putting queso on my nipples, but within ten minutes I was a self-serve burrito bar.
well at that point we were just fucking to keep warm.
In case you were wondering, it hurts when the bouncer throws your phone at you after kicking you out of the strip club for taking pictures.
Worst part of blacking out... Waking up and having to do the teeth check
Hey man. We haven't met but my name is Ben. I threw up a bunch at your house last night. I heard you smoke though so I'll smoke you out anytime.
I have cobwebs on my vagina for halloween. And bats fly out when I open my legs.
THANK YOU for not letting me make out with that girl omfg I was one step away from a foursome in the handicapped stall
Do you know how hard it is to give a bj in your dead grandmothers car
took shots off of a myriad of fake boobs last night. It was glorious.
And now let us go forth, and be garbage people in public.
Isn't that our default mode?
I’m so poor I’m filling a flask with vodka and bringing it to the bar.
You really do take on your dog's personality she sounded like her pug breathing when we were going at it.
Randomize