I think I'm going to be in trouble for sneaking out last night. My Dad saw me drive up this morning when he was leaving early for work.
What'd you say?
I told him I was sleep driving
What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
I'm not sure where but someone shit somewhere in the house
Yea...coming from the girl who didn't understand why m&ms and tequila wasn't a "suitable diet"
gave myself the "you're a really good girlfriend" talk on the way to where i intentionally cheated on him. i am my own drunken therapist.
just chugged some gatorade and threw it up. todays gonna be awesome
asked the girl next to us on line to take a picture of us and she shared her bacardi. i love white people.
He's like Medusa, you can't look directly into his eyes or you'll turn into a slut.
You burned the hair off your arms. Again.
It grows back stronger each time.
i knew as soon as i met you that i was gonna be the designated driver
I seriously have her in my phone as "Legit 8"...even I'm surprised
How likely is it that we can see each other tomorrow night? I want to shave my legs in good faith but it's cold outside and my bathroom is drafty.
Threw up on break at work. That brings our collective tally to 9 times. We can never drink like that on a monday again
you have to get here a cop came into the bar and she looks like Sarah Palin. I think I'm gonna try and bang her
Feel free to drag me back to reality at your convenience
Randomize
