Just puked on the beach. Hungover. In front of my parents. I love summer.
I just made doing the dishes into a drinking game. crafty, or pathetic?
My google searches from last night: tetanus shot rabbit bite, Bacardi gluten free
I want to wear something that says I'm a lady (but I have condoms!)
i hope youre ready for a shit show because we just ordered a whole pitcher of red headed sluts
Do you have any idea how horrifying it is to hear your sister and her husband fucking then immediately go down stairs only to hear your parents fucking....... I wish I was Hellen Keller right now.
I'm approaching homosexuality at an increasingly alarming rate with each break up.
We turned on "find my friends" and watched her progress. Got concerned when she didn't move for an hour on Adelaide, turned out a booty call was made, then she went back to the bars.
TGIFridays...stall number 1...drunk...send help
It makes no sense at first, you go with it, it's fun and entertaining and then a disaster
I am at a new level of appreciation for drunk-you, who threw up into her own sweatshirt pocket last night in the car. Brava.
So... I woke up on a bench with a honey bun on my chest.
Just check with her if girls can get blown, that's all.
It's best not to have your booty call on social media. So if they post stupid shit, you still want to fuck them.
i said cake fell into my bra, you stood up and yelled "Im coming soldier", leaped acrossed the couch and started motorboating my boobs. i would have been cool with it if your mom didnt keep calling me the "lesbiainizer"
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