dude on moped wearing crocs...somebody get this guy his man card back
It was like a fairy tale, until he tried to put it in my ass...
there was a guy here who managed to get his head stuck in a fishbowl. no, I don't fuckin know how
I'm sorry..where i come from learning how to exploit a wealthy middle aged man is a right of passage
I'm telling people I'm celibate. It sounds cooler when it's by choice.
Going home with an argentinian named sulvio. Ill let you know how it goes.
I never want to hear the words 'my therapist says . . . ' while naked again.
you shall refer to me as my indian name from now on...running with dumb cunts
I tried...failed..now im naked on the futon since clothes are hard.
Its not like i paid for sex. She was stuck there, we simply exchanged rides.
I have to deal with three things I do not like this weekend. Pooping in toilets that are not mine. Air mattresses. Not beating off in the shower.
She's in the bathroom. Literally just told me she could make a guy cum using just her words. Not bad for Sunday brunch.
As a general rule of thumb, I don't call until the claw marks have healed.
i can do like, 15 pushups. 20 if i listen to dubstep.
Smargarita sloshedurday tomorrow around 2
Bring a helmet for your liver
Randomize
