Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
the #6 from wendy's when stoned is definitely better than sex. i dont care what anyone says.
something about eating while taking a crap just doesn't seem safe to me.
we made out inside of a kiddie slide for about 20 mins. it was the sexiest, most suffocating experience I've ever had
I legitimately woke up with a girl trying to snort cocaine off my dick.
There is only one good excuse for how sore I am right now. And that is incredibly acrobatic sex. Unfortunately for me that is not my excuse.
Eating this pizza pocket is like eating out god
you told that cab driver that when the 3 of us come togehter it means happiness and love
Thanks be to the Goddess of Whores!! I straightened my bed before Ken got here. Found Calvin's boxers in the sheets!!!!
no joke- she just sprinkled parmesan cheese into her champagne and slurred "I just need a little snack"
He peed off the roof and then we bonded it was beautiful
My roommates don't agree with the whole tv in the bathroom idea. Fucking barbarians.
You 2012 self promised me that you would do LSD with me, and it's 2015 now. So.
Plus, I'm basically a doctor, so what could go wrong.
Looks like I'm not in the Ashly Madison files. But my wife is.
dude I fucking saw you snort tequila
Randomize
