he was wearing sponge bob boxers. Guess how long he lasted.
Hey i just realized that im masturbating in the exact same kind of chair that they are doing it on in this porno
Please return the baby Jesus and sheep to the quad
I'm stoned and have been watching so many cartoons that I changed the channel and real people were on, and it scared me
YouTube is recomending me a video on how to make a home made meth bong, what has my life come to?
Being drunk at the hospital is better than i expected. I got to hide and play in the little kids waiting area. Btw no one is hurt
did we decide the 'sorry about the threesome' cake was too flippant?
In that case, I'll try 2 find a date. But my options are AA friends or fuck buddies.
Fell twice in five points. on my face. literally during a cross walk. The cars just went around me. 21st birthday memories right there
All I see when I think of you are dancing penis angels around your head.
i had a tequila and emotion induced one night stand with a random stranger. senior year: infinity me: 0.
Great sex, the promise of us mixing our excellent genetics in the future, and access to drugs are mainly what's holding this relationship together at the moment
We put a ban on pants at an unusually early point in the night.
It's 7am. I'm sitting on the curb in last nights clothes with a nose bleed and no idea how to get home. Low moment I feel.
It's official. My little brother has had more sex in my car than I have. I'm still tied with my little sister. I hate everybody.
Randomize
