is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
girls mom is dying from cancer and she msgs me for a booty call. I guess people cope with their situations differently.
there were like 150 questions AFTER the application. you'd think for a store that has dick molding kits it'd be a joke
Sharon took in a random bleeding stranger drunker than her, named her Nicole, and is feeding her jello shots on the toilet
I told him I'd go cook him breakfast, but ended up passing out on the kitchen floor in the fetal position spooning the dog
Bad breakup?
He posted a pic of me fully naked and smiling as he inserted a carrot into my vagina as my FB profile pic and then changed the PW, locking me out of my own account. So 500 of my closest friends, family, and coworkers now have that mental image of me on FB.
I keep looking at his nude pics and crying because ill never see it in person again.
we were playing waterfall, then strip waterfall, then we were just listening to music, drinking, and slowly becoming more naked
Congratulations, you've begun to unfuck your life.
Of course I have to cross through a walk for hunger
got into a verbal altercation with Luke Harangoty last night over a table. Called him a cross-eyed fuck and got the table.
It felt like I was on painkillers mixed with Molly mixed with the sinking feeling I'll die alone. 10/10 doing again.
How bad is it that I can say that this isn't the first time a married man, who is in the military, has tried to make me his mistress?
breakfast this morning: omelette, Valium and baileys hot chocolate
Now that sounds like the breakfast of champions
He thought reverse cowgirl meant he dressed up as a cowgirl. Honestly, it was more creepy than funny
Randomize
