I really think my calling is to star in a Live Links commercial
is it wrong to smoke out middle schoolers?
yes...dear jesus what did you do?
bwahaha. ask your little brother in about 20 minutes. im dropping him off.
No i dont need Magnum Condoms, that would be like putting MC Hammer pants on my dick
he was shitfaced drunk and couldn't walk but could still recite the top 10 in order from the first season of american idol. impressive
I worked with a girl tonight that recognized me solely from a keg stand she witnessed me do sophmore year. Needless to say this made my night
I might come over. Something about you makes me matronly and I have this urge to nurse you back to health with soup and a blowjob
the tv said "its small, its comfortable..." and i started laughing... safe to say he lost any dignity he had left...
I can always see lesbian subplot. It's my hero ability.
the other day i was so high i found pages and pages of pictures of HD hamburgers and patriotic music. bong rips for merica.
best eviction party ever.
it wasn't an eviction party you asshole, you just happened to get yourself evicted during the party.
well smoking weed has become a deal breaker for me so I pretty much use "let's go smoke a blunt" as an icebreaker
I don't remember much from my 21st, but my mom said I insisted on the fat guy taking body shots off me
They made up a new version of "Smash or Pass" called "I would(n't) let you sit on my face" to yell at the freshman
after sex he fell asleep with his water bottle in one hand and his dick in the other at 6pm. I'm a winner.
Pretty sure I got at least one girl to question her sexuality at the Christmas party last night
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