the chick doesn't look like she's put anything in her mouth for weeks other than his dick.
I dont know why I dont listen to you more often. He wont stop texting me. And his signature is "dancing with no panties on"
all he gave me for my birthday was sperm
at least its a homemade gift
If a Romanian girl's marriage isn't considered legal in the US then she's fair game right?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I ended up taking shots of whiskey and chasing them with potato wedges, I have never felt more Irish
I don't even know where to begin....there's queso sauce and public hair stuck to everything
No, absolutely not. If you see that cunt, throw confetti or eggs at her.
That's a pretty extreme jump from confetti to eggs
Some guy just showed up at my door to return my bikini top. EXPLAIN NOW
Um...It has come to my attention that I may have said some rather vulgar things about Sean Connery to you and anyone listening last night, so...I apologize for that. I meant the things I said. But still. Sorry.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What i love about my dog is i can lay in bed and masturbate with him at the foot, and he just leaves me alone.
I was thinking about the biological process causing me to puke while I was puking. THAT'S how much I'd been studying.
I ended up in th ER yelling my height weight and age
It's gonna be me and some oreos tonight. Basically like sex
Well you could have stayed home, played house and got blow jobs all weekend babe, but we all have to live with our decision
I don't want to date him...I just want him to cheat on his girlfriend with me.
Randomize