I got called a slut by a bunch of girls that work at Hooters..wtf is that shit? explain that to me
It was still light ouot when we were walking up Pier Ave and she kept asking if she could suck my nipples.
guess who just trotted in eating her oats and wagging her penis
never. drinking. again.
lets not get ahead of ourselves.
I was wondering where I've seen this kid then I remembered I saw him doing lines of blow of his gf's leg while she was sleeping last week.
shes perfect for him. shes never seen a penis so she has nothing to compare his to.
One of my coworkers just invited me to a wet t-shirt contest this weekend in honor of her son's 21st Birthday.
Now that we both have boys can we make up games that objectify them as sex toys?
When you get a chance, you should call Nick. He REEAAAALLLLLY wants to hear you make chewbacca noises.
So are we just not going to talk about the time I came home to you jerking it in the kitchen?
Learn from me. Do not smoke cigs and fold laundry in your room. The cigarette will fall into the dresser without you noticing and your shirts will be on fire. Wanna go shopping tomorrow? I need some new shirts.
Apparently I told him he would be good for human sacrifice.
I'm trying to fuck him and feed him. I don't understand why it isn't working.
Well, I can now cross "dirty drunk homeless hobo" off of my bucket list of people who have been successful wingmen for me. North Carolina is getting weird.
You -do- realize there are other things to talk about than just how different parts of you smell like pussy, right?
Randomize
