I called her the wrong name twice and she still called me back this morning. DO I still wait two days to call her back?
I'll bet she douches with gravy.
After 9 shots a girl with a mustache......still not attractive
Thanksgiving. A stoners favorite holiday
guess where i woke up this morning? If you guessed the hospital, you sir are correct.
I'm not sure if doing him was such a good idea. Yes the sex was good, but I'm scared I set myself up for failure in 2011 because he's the hottest guy. Ever.
Did you write your name in the dust on our toilet tank?
Cats found the secret coke stash again
They owe us $80.
It's a given that you're going to get peed on at a country concert
Sad Megan is Sad
Have you been drinking my beer?
Wtf are freshmen gonna think when the first thing they see in a pale 6'4 white kid with a mustache yelling ya man and we be liming in a Trinidadian accent
It's not so much that I'm giving her money because I threw up on her floor. It's more like I'm paying her to never ever mention it again.
When that wave blew your top off I heard someone yell "SPANK BANK"
As a former fat girl, that's probably the best compliment I've ever received ever!
First post college job and I got fired within a week. Something tells me that adulthood isn't going to be as much fun as sex and the city led me to believe.
So many questions...the two most important are, where the fuck is my booze and how did you even get the couch through the door?
Randomize
