you kept running across the street. everytime you made it across successfully you took something off. can't believe there were no cops around...
oh thats it?
I don't care if he is my ex... I have the deed to his dick until someone else fucks him. We broke up 2 years ago.... I am still holding that deed!
i just ran into our bio chem professor at the bar. apparently, he doesn't follow the "no slapping your students' asses" rule.
I blacked out after the shots of canned lobster bisque.
Well regardless of which drugs we choose to do tonight until four in the morning, we are having a wii bowling championship. So choose carefully.
Remember when you tried to pay that stripper to cry on stage?
Something's wrong. My throat is definitely not in it's normal spot. Way too low.
1st rule of birth control pills: do not stop taking birth control pills. 2nd rule of birth control pills: do NOT STOP taking birth control pills.
BTW I totally understand panda express being popular amongst the highs. I can feel the shrimp being slaughtered in my mouth. It's fantastic.
College: when you wake up drunk without pants and wearing a Cosby sweater
His last name was woodcox? That just screams I've got a great penis
I just hit your bf in the face with a mustard bottle and the guy at the table next to us bowed down to me.
I am having telepathic thoughts with my cat. He loves me and wants me to blow his nose
shut up and let me use my vagina as a weapon of self destruction in peace!
Sorry i ignored you for so long. I think my vibrator is broken.
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