Those strippers last night smelled great. It was the perfect mixture of vanilla and daddy issues.
i rewarded my self with tacobell for not throwing up on any one. MISTAKE
i really wish i had a remote for my computer. its all the way on my bed while im across the hall puking my brains out to enya. not cool.
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
Numbies before the dentist, such a good idea.
But i don't feel like talking to him right now. I woke up an hour ago to a picture of his penis and I AM NOT A MORNING PERSON.
Is it bad if one of my goals right now is to snort blow through a licorice?
Don't answer that. It is bad.
Oh, and also, a couple of straight girls showed up. But they ran away.
also I woke up naked and covered in water but nobody can explain that part.
Apparently I really was petting a bunny named lazarus in Jimmy Johns last night.
It just makes me feel nauseous. And I don't want to feel nauseous when all I really want is to get off.
There is nothing wrong with watching parks and rec all day then getting blackout drunk by night
Uhmmmm is there really any way to tactfully ask "you into me jerking you off with my feet... or nah" cause if you find one let me know 😂
Well that didn’t go as expected.
I mean, it ended in you giving each of them a blowjob, so it kinda did.
Any chance he has an open marriage? That penis shouldn’t be wasted on one woman. It should be shared with all womankind, or at least me. I’m too good at sex to be deprived a penis that large
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