You made me cry and you don't even care
Dude, way to rack up $80 in pornos in the hotel room last night, and not tell me before I got blindsided at check out.
Heh. Guess I ordered some porno last night. Heh.
Just saw ur first draft of ur suicide note.
You spelled "worthless" wrong.
You tried to call "time out" during the sobriety test.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just used my boobs as a ramp to guide ramen into my mouth.
The fire alarm went off at 3 am in the freshmen dorm. So guess which junior everyone now knows is hooking up with a freshman? This girl...
Dude, I need a lifestyle change. I'm to old to be making out with chicks in foam parties, letting older chicks get all excited because I let them put their hands up my shirt, and running around doing scavenger hunts with 18 yr old chicks.
God I need to stop before there's a picture of my dick on my mom's phone.
Of course it may just be the context. A dish of dog food would look lovely next to your breasts.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Jessica just ate her lipstick. That's how the night is going
It's a good thing vaginas don't have taste buds
He said that he made a girl squirt to the ceiling and I got curious
I will feed you tacos. I will touch your butt. Happy Valentine's Day ❤️
Can I pee and smoke my bong at the same time or is that like eating on the toilet
I feel like a dancer trapped in the body of a math instructor. Love, Mom
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