Denial is the first step to alcoholism…and I don't hate it
I can see my step sister's thong. Don't know if I should let myself be turned on or not
yea and when she crawled to her room she yelled at a bookbag to "get the fuck out my way"
the jail released me with 39 mardi gras beads. I need details.
he was wearing 3D glasses the whole time.
The homeless ppl in LA are great. Theres sum guy that makes all of his clothes out of tighty whitey underwear. He makes bags out of them 2. Presumably 2 hold more underwear.
I think I just puked all over my comforter and my roomdmate won't wakt up to washc it for me
Its like I instantly had a mental image of me in my mugshot.
my goal is to not remember how i make a living by 9pm saturday night
You really need to get over the whole "jail" thing. Its really not that bad.
I think we should get high on adderall and nair each other again for New years.
i can feel the knowledge leaking out of my brain
replace it with alcohol - nature abhors a vacuum
At one point I was waiting in line for the port o potties and a storm trooper came out of one and sprayed me in the face with a water gun
Like that actually happened I wasn't hallucinating
I was at a hookups house and peed in his sink so I wouldn't wake up his mom... drunk me is on a different level
Fuck my life... Im so horny Im gonna take it out on this sandwich
Randomize
