i just saw a white kid with an afro using a martini shaker as a coffee thermos. go college.
Clearly I understand physics better when I'm on cocaine
I left him a voicemail saying i went through with the abortion and he texts me back one thing... the bbm "phew" face. really?
I did shrooms last night. My drug checklist is complete, I can finally graduate.
all im saying is that if he was a normal person, he would have fucked me by now.
I went around and congratulated every guy that had a beard for having one
Goddamn tequila
Do you ever actually plan things? Or is it always drugs then whatever happens? I'm considering being worried about you
What we have is to special to throw away over a woman who spreads her butt cheeks on a pool table for me...
I need vodka and champagne for my new favorite drink, vodkapagne. Alternative spellings are "vodkapain" and "vom-machine"
So the guy I hooked up with during welcome week just tried to booty call me from across the lecture hall at 9am. I don't think he gets how this works...
My skirt was too short for the church and I brought my flask to the Scrooge play. God bless us, everyone!
Wish me luck. My vagina needs it.
May his noodley appendage touch you.
Its like a glacier coming out of my asshole.
My horoscope should say: you're an alcoholic, get help today, Pisces
After he came, he took a two minute power nap and then fucked me for another 45 minutes. He is a machine!
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