Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
the condom got lost in my hair
Just heard the new 'We are the world' ... Can I get my 10 bucks for Haiti back?
his tattoo said carpe diem which i thought was ironic considering his epilepsy
In my defense it was my birthday and I really wanted to do it.
One of my other friends found me and the dog in the back seat of this one guy's car....I don't even know
i had to take off my light up shamrock necklaces, my professor was getting suspicious.
You showed up at my apartment after 3 am wasted with a plate of cookies and tried to hook up.
Sorry about that. Except for the cookies.
You fuck like a mechanic. That is the universe telling you that is your true calling. Take this as a sign.
You see.... Im at the point in my life where pissing in a toilet is a luxury for me
just got caught singing "pop that pussy" by a very old man at work. *face palm*
He literally named all the parts of the vagina as he fingered me. No more pre-med virgins.
AMERICA LOVES YOU. RIDE THAT DICK LIKE PAUL REVERE RODE HIS HORSE SO MANY YEARS AGO
We could have mediocre awkward sex or mediocre stunted/awkward/uncomfortable banter. The possilities are relatively finite
I'm touching everything in your apartment with my penis.
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