Why are you at a bar in Connecticut?
Long story. One that now involves lots of delicious chicken wings om nom nom
she asked if she could keep her bee antennas on during her mugshot. i love halloween.
So i think we're being coned into a threesome with the promise of pokemon
Played "Which Couple Will Take Me Home Tonight" at the bar last night... I can now cross three-some off my bucket list
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's just a matter of time. The ball is in my court. Soon to be in her mouth.
I have sand in every orifice, there are bruises everywhere, and I smell like a distillery. I love summer.
It's kind of hard to say bye to you when you fall asleep on the bar..
I know that was a dream because I woke up and there was no pizza
The hookers weren't a dream get tested
Fuck I am starving. I don't think I've eaten in the past two days.
You didnt need to. Gin is like eggs, its a perfectly nutrionally balanced meal.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If he comes over tomorrow, im answering the door naked. Simple as that.
i want to be friends with one of those mini shredded wheat men.
I just flicked a lizard out of the window with a bud light in one hand and spatula inthe other...dont tell me you dont miss the south
We just won 1800 at the casino and are going to the strip club. Who gives a fuck if it's 5pm
On the bright side, only one more day until we aren't sober anymore.
So? Find me, fuck me, then you can go to sleep and I'll leave.
Wow. That's the most amazing thing anyone has ever said to me.
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