I think we were cool up until the point where he saw that planned parenthood was on my speed dial.
I was thinking Sara Jessica Parker was hot. That high.
I knew I was high when I wanted to write a poem about how great it felt to wash my face
Dude, didn't you know? Its balls out wednesday.
Woke up naked on my floor covered in cookies. We should celebrate fake hurricanes every weekend.
I really don't want to. I just don't know how to nicely say "dude I'm having a rough time in life right now and I just need to dress like a stripper cop, get shit faced, and have dirty crazy sex"
Im shrooming at the foot of a tree on top of a mountain. Feeling fly as fuckin socrates and bon iver.
When he gets asked "is it in?" more than his name you arent missing out on much more than a petite tampon.
All I want to do is sleep. And If I'm not sleeping, I want to be eating or fucking. I'm pretty sure being pregnant has turned me into a dude.
She was giving me head while we were in my tree house, my mom then came out to let the dog out so she stopped so I would stop groaning, was it good? You tell me
She just won 2 Grammys at 17 and were sitting here hotboxing our half bathroom
my life could not get any worse. just saw my sister in a porno
I had to write an apology letter to my roomate for hotboxing in our bathroom. What a bitch.
You went into the bathroom, got in the tub with a pillow, yelled "this isn't as comfortable as it looks in the movies" then passed out
Remember those neighbors I thought were FBI agents? Turns out they're DEA.
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