maybe touching the ground while going 70 wasn't such a great idea after all..
jess passed out on the pong table. it was depressing until we started singing shania twain an hour later and heard her muffled voice singing along.
You were plastered and wouldn't stop telling this hot girl about your plan to graffiti a church in easter colored spray-paint saying that Jesus was a Zombie... she kept saying her father was a pastor...
I found him crying and drunk, in my closet holding a picture of Tyler Perry. He managed to say"he's just so many people"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think I ruined Robin and Mikes anniversary. I walked in on them fucking, accidentally broke the necklace he gave her, and I stole the keg from their party. Not in that order
sooo... you have no idea who nailed their tubesocks to my wall?
czant get you from the arport. sry i found the rum. dan sucks at rumpong jusrt so yo knoqw.
i now officially have to be stoned in order to look like my passport when i go to a different country
The way I'm gonna look at it is, if you don't makeout with your roommate once in college, you didn't do something right.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It would only make sense that I'd cheat on him with his best friend on the ides of march...
Who was the person who brought the rooster when they won @ beer pong
Some guy is here using a taser on people. I'm up next
Thank you. Next to bondage, soft American Apparel t-shirts are the best things you've taught me about.
If you set your screensaver to be a slides show, make sure you remove dick pics first. This lesson 1 of living with your great aunt
I was woken up at 6 am by a second grader trying to give me a sweatshirt for a pillow
Randomize