Annihilated within 20 minutes of arriving on Saturday, proceeded to hook up with him half a dozen times/almost have sex in the shed. Later on I text his boyfriend letting him know he's okay and that he's asleep next to me. If I could parlay this skill into a vital component of national security I'd be the Jack Bauer of homewrecking. Diner later?
she offered me iced tea and went to go change.then her dad came in the door.i thought i was on how to catch a predator.
im marching my happy ass in there and im not leaving until he cheats on his girlfriend!
What I'm saying is Afghanistan is America's sexually contracted disease.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Don't be alarmed at the girl laying on your bathroom floor.
I have Retrograde Ejaculation as a side effect from one of my meds. Is this a respectable form of birth control?
I'm gonna make a therapist very happy and very wealthy this semester.
All I could think when I saw it was, "All right, Vagina, only one of us is getting out of this alive."
I think his roommates are using word magnets to tell me that they can hear us. His fridge currently says, "Chris ate out naughty girl."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Side note: Hot guys are now getting with ugly chicks. Alert the media.
I will have to bone him sometime between now and July so he will move all my shit again
Basically all I do anymore is get stoned with my cats, and then we share goldfish.
He asked when the last time I had sex was. I had to look at the clock and respond "12 hours ago"
Weight watchers just said "you've tracked beer three times recently, want to make it one of your favorites?" I'm begining to understand why I needed to go in the first place.
HE WAS CUMMING IN THAT DICK PIC
Randomize