I just want to hang out with her.
You're a liar. Why do I have to give you reasons you can't have sex with my mom? I hate you.
wait, do i give off the impression that i DON'T want girls to show me their boobs if i video chat with them?
Nothing good has ever or will ever come from 50 cent beers at the bowling alley..
We were driving to the party as he was giving me key bumps.. That's what I call team work
No no no no no. Not interrested. She looks just like Kim's fat booth picture. Only real.
He gets creativity points for the hot sauce. But it may be awhile until my nipples forgive him
I mean, how many people can say they helped surgically remove something from their body? Other than the guy that got his hand stuck under a rock and cut it off. Doesn't count
Is it some european holiday today? We both woke up to find loaves of bread in our rooms...
There is a positive side to a sinus infection. Exclusively cowgirl sex. I've convinced her I'd pass out if I had to do the work.
my question is who was more confortable? You sleeping on the floor or me tweeting from a bush?
My fuck buddy is great and all, but it gets weird when she gets in arguments with her BF in the driveway
well, at the moment I'm sleeping in someone's closet in a buzzlightyear snuggie, so I can't judge,
I just realized my new apartment is at the corner of Patrick Henry and Mary Jane.
Give me weed or give me death?
At least you didn't get an invite in the mail to your fuck buddy's baby shower like I just did. My life is a sitcom
Can i have the words "she went crazy and never came back" written on my grave?
Randomize
