You should probably just propose to him the old fashioned way: sleep with him and get pregnant.
I just peed in the Schreyer honors college shrubbery. Thanks honors students, you're finally good for something
I have to have sex with him again. I feel like I need to train him so no other girl experiences that bad of sex.
You need 4-7 business day to recover from a fingering like that.
Be subtle and tell lucas that he should sleep here tonight. And by subtle, i mean show him this text...
Well it's a moot point because I did have a sink & I peed in it.
I bought a sword. Make the proper arrangements.
When you give the bridesmaid toast someday at my wedding I need you to quote Ricky Bobby in some form. And slip in your sister has the vagina of awesomeness. That is all.
I need a straight guy to pretend to be my boyfriend for 30 minutes so that I can pull off an act of petty vengeance. Interested?
I wish I was in the big bed with a naked you post sex eating chicken nuggets
You're alright. You just passed out while we were having sex. Then I'm pretty sure you peed. So I went home.
Only thig bad about that muscular chick from the gym is she liked it so rough I had to bust out a few wrestling moves from highschool
I need ecstasy. And, before you ask, the answer is yes right now
Someone drank my pedialite!
YOU drank your pedialite. I watched you chase shots with it!
I went to steal condoms from your room and all I could find was chik fil a sauce
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