so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
I'd give my left nut to see you
don't do that. I like the set
I spit up blood this morning
That's vegas.
it was like that last scene in "It's A Wonderful Life" but with alcohol
I literally might walk of shame home on a cable car. If that doesn't scream San Francisco I don't know what does
Its name is Richard. And I think he formally introduced us.
Honestly, I've had enough of his asshole to last me the new year.
Please tell me you're talking about his personality.
EVERYONE IS SPEAKING SPANISH. I ONLY KNOW HOLA.
So. Do you think marshmallow vodka in hot chocolate while eating a graham cracker would = s'mores?
In some strange universe, yes
PLAN B IS EXPENSIVE ON A $50 A WEEK BUDGET.
Its raining shots and i keep catching them in my mouth like you with dicks shits crazy
Is it weird that sometimes I like to have sex for the health benefits and workout more than the pleasure
All I know is I woke up with my apartment door wide open, naked, and I poured an entire bottle of Advil on my bed to sleep in.
Foreign objects found in purse this morning include: chocolate covered pretzels, pepper spray, and farm animal shaped key chains (you know the ones you squeeze and fake poop comes out, yea those)
my personal favorite... An "I'm sorry you broke your finger and cant play sports for awhile" blowjob!
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