My mom just told me that after i turned eight i stopped growing mentally and emotionally
hot girl, 5 o clock
do you know how to read a clock?
i just realized i've hooked up with every boy in this taco bell
That's the classiest thing you've ever said.
I just experienced a full blown christian wedding. I am SO GLAD YOUR WEDDING WASNT THIS.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you told the cop you blew a .08 because you ate poppy seeds
Just made everyone at my party download the vuvuzela app for iPhone, the neighbors absolutely HATE us
They were going around the house breaking things and screaming "Not my house!"
In case you come back to the room and i'm not here, yes there's a cup filled with gravy in the microwave. Just take it out if you need to heat something.
I just want to jump into a ballpool of dicks now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have family pictures in an hour and a half and I'm 9 beers deep. This is how I get written out of my grandparents will...
The sad part is that if I don't get a random pic of your balls or ass or both every month, I start to worry that we're not friends anymore
You cried for a while then lifted lots of weights then cady's ex put glitter on your tits and then you took a nap. I got you pizza and brought you home. Nothing too exciting.
Is there a tactful way to ask "how are your balls?" Or do I just ask point blank
I just woke up naked in a bed with your brother. WHAT THE HELL HAPPENED TO NOT LETTING EACH OTHER DO STUPID THINGS?
You fucked my brother?!
Get over here and bring your drill!!! The strippers next door need help installing a stripper pole by their pool
Randomize