that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
I think she kind of thinks she's better than us now ... please. I go to Michigan.
Someone should've told Pope jumper lady and terrorist pants guy that the Worst of 2009 lists already went out....
So apparently when I was 2, I went around drinking everybody's beer at some wedding, then passed out in a corner....
This explains a lot.
I'm starting to have hip problems from having my legs spread too often.
I'm just here to guide your spirit, avoiding herpes is on you though
It started out just like any other night: was watching a Zach Effron movie, drinking tequila out of a water bottle. I don't understand how this got out of hand.
Unless you have figured out how to blow me through the phone don't drunk dial me.
you're expensive. Idk about all this. What happened to free make outs?
Sobriety and mild self-respect
Seeing your one night stand on campus never gets less awkward. Why is Subway the only good place to eat?
Best part of Friday afternoon drinking? Having ping pong balls thrown into my cleavage.
Soooo we should kick it sometime when it's like light outside. Drink outta cups.. Be bitches. 7, 6, 3, 5.. 4, 2, 1... Sschhkiddaellladiieessscchk
You attract beautiful men with jobs. I attract ONE WITH A SOUL PATCH.
it was a sexy soul patch.
I may quit my job to go be a costumed Jedi at Disneyland.
that awkward moment when you use blowjob jokes as a segue into coming out as bi
Randomize
