don't you miss dr. quinn: medicine woman? i do.
I wish i knew how bad drinking and hieghts were before i got up here
And then somehow we were arguing over how to fold our arms
Were playing bathroom attendees at the party and making people wash their hands
i made a dollar
He kept moaning America instead of Erica while fucking me.
He is the one I "technically" lost my virginity to.
I feel like you never had a virginity..
when you come home i just want to let you know we are cats now. and we are out of eggs.
Thanks for fingering me to orgasm during Wu-Tang Clan
He's talking about feelings now. I don't even know if he came???
Ok, not to minimize the significance of that beautiful anecdote from your childhood, but here's a video of my penis.
Things were going really well until his cousin showed up. She told him I look kind of like his mom, which started a ten-minute debate on my and his mother's specific features, and ultimately, who is prettier. Guess who my date picked.
I am a bad person
You slept with him. Was it good?
I wasnt going to but I was too lazy to blow up the air mattress
oh.. my GOD my dad just text me... "i need a naked women" ........... help?
Omg. I checked my purse this morning and I'm pretty sure drunk me stole a frat guys tube of crest 3d white toothpaste. Like that's pretty fucked up but I think if I knew someone did that to me I'd probably still invite them over again cuz I'd be like, "this girl's creative, and has good hygiene."
She got a boob job, dumped her husband, became a stripper, got a DUI in her Porsche and is now dating her lawyer
I’m making her my life coach if med school doesn’t work out
Randomize