How did you manage that?
Told her it wasn't GENITAL herpes... just ORAL herpes... on my penis
lol... jersey girls rock
the "happy anniversary" cake for my mom and dad is about to turn into the "yeah, that's a hickey, welcome back from italy" cake.
Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
i just realized that the oil change sticker on my windshield is a day before the last time i had sex. I've driven exactly 10500 miles since.
you need to get laid.. and an oil change.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
apparently i was just sitting there with my shirt down holding my boobs saying "its ok. its all gonna be ok"
So. Much. Sex. I feel like i ran a marathon then someone kicked me in the vagina. Soo worth it
My hope for you over spring break is that you can be some disease free girl's random spring break mistake.
There are 18k people at the game and I'm next to the one guy who pulls his underwear down to his ankles to piss.
I wonder what chicks would think if they learned that when we add them on fb we email their bikini pics to each other.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sitting here reading the internet and all i have to show for this summer is a shitty tan and the possible case of clamidia.
I like to think it's an accomplishment that I can relate my life to a T-pain song
Wait..I'm drunk and butt naked making a pizza. Happy Wednesday.
dont you DARE use my tequila influenced words against me
we were running around the halls trying to bloodhound search out the source of the weed smell, but we ran into six other people doing the same thing, and they all said they assumed it was us.
I'm eating a bagel on the toilet and watching porn. Trust me, I've got my priorities straight.
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