apparently you CAN get banned from Nascar.
So I was talking to her on the phone last night and had to mute it so I could take a crap.
Side Note: My mute button doesn't work.
What can I say...he's packing some serious heat down there. You wouldn't expect that looking at him, huh?
I guess God knew he was going to be bald...
is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Only now do I see "not intended for use on skin" warning. Wonderful. But hey, my dick smells like magic marker.
Remind me that when I'm pregnant, I should NOT post vaginal dilation updates on my facebook. Ever.
woke up in a garbage bag. literally. it was used as a sleeping bag.
Just signed my boyfriend up on a dating website so I could officially have a reason to leave him for my hot neighbor.
See this is why people shouldn't jump into marriage. See what type of drunk you're engaged to first.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I command you to take a shot and dance like the pretty little gay boy you are.
MY TWIN SISTER IS ENGAGED. I REPEAT, MY SCREW UP OF A SISTER IS ENGAGED. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
I'll be there in 20 with vodka.
I want to tell everyone I've ever met about how he him picking me up and fucking me against the wall was the highlight of my life. Worst lesbian ever.
Could be all of this cough syrup, but I’m ready to fuck 2018 up!
I have beer and butt plugs...pretty sure I will find a way to entertain myself while I wait
I haven't listened to news as I've been having lesbian sex all night. Anything new?
Randomize