she tasted like a mixture of sweat and destiny
Vibrating panties would be amazing during this conversation!
Then he told me I had the most beautiful looking vulva
It's hard to believe so much cum came out of such a small penis.
I don't have any swimsuits that don't show off the weird handprint bruises on my hips. Do you have a onepiece I can borrow?
I asked you if you needed a ride and you kept saying "no, my name is katelyn"
Overslept. So hungover. Apparently texting the first person in my contact list the time I would like to wake up is not how the alarm clock in my phone actually works.
You don't understand. This could be the last time I shave a star into my vag. Get over here.
tell me why they applauded then the bartender locked himself in the bathroom when i walked into the bar today ????
Jesus christ. I put you on speaker when you called me last night and you told me to brush my teeth with a dick.
Go makeout with Mickey Mouse so we can get FastPass tickets
Just don't have sex while watching Home Alone. It will ruin Christmas for you.
quickly learned not to sleep with your roommate and work colleague in the same week
Life lesson... stop having side pieces that know each other...ffs.
Well, I ruined his toilet and he's still completely okay with me. Plus, it took him like a week to tell me.
If a girl I didn't love ruined my toilet I don't think I'd stick around.
Randomize