I actually enjoy jerking off to her facebook more than I enjoy actually fucking her. Just something with our generation
Okay, quick math test. If our entire group can do at least 6 shots a night, how much alcohol will be needed to keep us shit faced for the rest of the week? This is for a grade. Anddd, go.
Every time I roll over in bed I land on a different vibrator. I feel I'm the only one with this problem.
Like it was the Mama Mia of shit shows. That bad.
being a senior sucks, I just started embracing my inner slutty college girl, and it's almost time to put her away...for like, ever. and i really like her.
Nothing bad can happen when you have a kiwi flavored condom. Absolutely nothing.
Hey, please tell me that you and dad are having actual steaks tonight and I did not just get sexted by my dad
I have a kicked-out-of-multiple-bars level hangover today
Fuck edible panties there is a dress made out of bacon
Ive only just recently decided that NOT fucking you would be best for both of us.
Boobs have been pretty central in my life somehow lately which makes me question if I am truly gay
no strings attached, like you could fuck him and then throw him off a building right after
I just rolled a blunt and took my bra off. I'm not going anywhere.
He's 30 years old and woke me up for a hand job. Last time I go home with someone I met through Tinder.
A fire alarm is going off in some building, people are running around naked and people are passed out in the MIDDLE of the sidewalk. If they ban parties again, I'm going to be pissed.
Randomize
