she broke up with me using backstreet boy lyrics
you deserved it if you knew it was backstreet boys.
four loko is officially banned. leave it to the kids from a state school to fuck it up for everyone
Its official. 'Jingle Bell Rock' gives me a boner. Thank you Lindsay Lohan & Rachel McAdams.
btw im using a cooler as a purse cause i love string cheese
Your either lost or getting food, if your lost find me a girl on your way back, if your getting food grab me a double cheese
Brown or brunette? Ketchup or mustard?
I love you bro
Blackout me just wants to pee on sober me's dreams. Literally.
I need to throw up and die. The order doesn't matter. I feel like shit
that's how you measure success
By how bad my vagina hurts on a Tuesday morning while I'm trying to figure out how I got white girl wasted on a Monday?
That man deserves a slow clap... He defied the power of the vagina
telling her she was ovary-acting wasn't the greatest idea. doing it in a text so she could see your spelling was where you really went wrong, though.
Can I get high for this class every tuesday? Its like a multi-sensory carnival acid trip.
Also either i just launched into space as a rocket or my legs just orgasmed, but i am high as a soul train
We were trying to organize all the customers to hold a window pickle race. as of 10:37 pm last night we are no longer allowed in our McDonalds.
Sorry for face licking, I probably won't do it again.
Also, I love cats. I sat on the floor and they sat with me.
He’s like Batman if Batman went down on me and gave me multiple toe curling orgasms. He left without saying a word before I pulled the pillow off my face
Find out if he’s shared his techniques with a friend and set me up with him. You know I’ve always had a thing for Robin!!!!
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