If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
Do you have any idea why the dryer isn't working?
Because you touch yourself at night.
he also called and said i only cheated on you 8 times but they were all trannies
and someone in the background yelling "one was fat so that counts as one and a half"
yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
Whats the name of the guy with his hand down my pants?
I miss your penis. I'm telling you this as a friend, like its just a really great penis. You should be proud of it.
He was taking the condom off and he turns to me and says, "You know how snakes can shed their skin?"
Did you leave your blow razor here? I need it for crafts.
I had to wash my hair with conditioner because my sister got hammered and gave the dog a 3am sprinkler bath with my shampoo.
I don't think she can come out, she went too hard in the Intro to Theater Drinking Game at 2:30
True love: he brought me a margarita while I was n the shower. He's a keeper.
this is definitely the first time I've ever had an orgasm and then had potatoes smeared on me within the same hour
I'm sitting in the shotgun seat of my car on full recline trying to pretend everything is ok
i don't know when underwear became an acceptable clothing choice for parties, but god help me i hope this isn't a passing trend.
Three cans of beer can fit in the shower catty... multi tasking
Randomize
