and we just had intercourse last night so i'm exhausted, fucked up on adderol, emotionally broken and just pissed
Don't you think facebook is a bit pretentious, suggesting friends and all? No facebook, I would NOT like to be friends with a girl whose fiancee I have slept with.
i wish there were pregnant emoticons
is 69 when you're sideways or up & down? I was on my back & confused.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
While I was fucking her, they came in and served us both weed from a hookah. best. friends. ever.
I just found 17 dollars of saltine crackers in my room. confused incredibly. suprised not at all.
You both must have been completely wasted because every once in a while we would hear you both stop and start singing to each other. At one point it was taylor swift.
He's 11. You dont draw dicks on 11 year olds, i dont care if he ate your lasagna
You were basically naked. Just covered in pink duck tape and feathers. I'd have to say this is beyond the slutty mark..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Fuck. I have to get my shit together by lunch. Mission impossible.
If it snows I'm making an igloo and getting wasted in it
I think we should have a sex position advent calendar
Yeah everywhere i go i feel like a 3rd or 5th or (2n+1)th wheel. That's right, i'm a mathematically depressed drunk.
I can’t tell if I have feelings for him or if my vagina does.
so let me get this straight you just stared at his boner all night?
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