how did your night go?
he asked for my myspace name.
it sounds like her vocal chords are covered in pudding and rocks. come get me.
you laugh because clearly you have never had to clean poop out of a tub
just saw a midget ride a motorized cooler into the liquor store. i'm gonna follow him home.
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Did Kevin really put his bar tab under the name Hercules last night?
How do you not remember seeing the kid from our chem lab table and repeatedly yelling "lab partners for life!" at him?
We should bet how many people are going to get alcohol poisoning next weekend and whoever wins gets a free Starbucks.
You yelled "hold my dick" before you tackled the guy away from the dj and two random girls moved to actually hold it, then argued about it. I want that whore aura!
My mom just came into the kitchen and watched me take a double shot of whiskey and chase it with a beer and said "you are my son." Proudest family moment ever
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Here is a brilliant idea passed on from men who have that same regret. WEAR A FUCKING CONDOM ALWAYS.
Plus he stuck it in when you were sleeping which would have been the tipping point for me but you art school kids are all liberal and shit
I've had my dick out in public way too much for someone my age...
He noticed my new Lipstick so later tonight it's going to be on his dick.
So this is how i'm celebrating Easter? By eating chicken nuggets and masturbating all day. What a life.
i may have just googled 'is philly rioting right now'
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