woke up with peach flovored chap stick on my taint ! dont ask why i know it was peach
No, that was before the police came, but after the hooker.
you got so mad from losing a game of beerpong that you went into another room by yourself and practiced for an hour and a half.
he said that weed should be legal but that particular bong shouldn't be. i stared at a clock for an hour and a half after i ripped. so logically, i completely agree.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We just had father kitten bonding time .. I was on the toilet , he was climbing the animal print shower curtain . It was magical
I feel like this is the moment of high where you have to write these texts down to remember to text them and feel that somehow this is important to the continuity of the world.
Craig, a bottle of Jamison, and I had a party on the roof last night. No idea how I got down. My injuries indicate fall...
The night went downhill when he lit her purse on fire and tried putting it out with vodka
Should I take my grandma to a keg tomorrow or not? Serious question
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I will kick you in all of your body parts. All at once.
I broke my heels and ended up on a random party bus where I passed out after a brief stripper pole incident.
I got wine drunk and bought a hedgehog
Isn't it funny how we're still best friends after that incident with the old lady in the bathroom
You fucking bailed on me. But I love you still
Did you just correct my spelling of a made up word?
No, I just was using your word in plural form
It's okay to admit that you're into redheads.
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