she was screaming in french about how classy it was to be drinking wine. oh... she was drinking it out of the bottle. with a beer in her other hand while throwing up.
Drinking in an igloo changes everything.
Broke up w/ my married coworker...work is gonna get weird.
To say he's a good fuck is like saying the beatles had a bit of success. My vag is still mourning the fact he moved.
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He grabbed onto my boobs while slipping on ice then proceeded to drag me down with him I'm not predicting head in his future
I really gotta be careful. My email inbox is equal parts notifications from instructors and this dude's dick. If I get drunk and reply to the wrong thing I might get kicked out of grad school.
cassie wtf are you alive??! no one has seen you for like seven hours whereeee did you go
IS IT POSSIBLE FOR A GUY TO NOT HAVE BALLS
Are you kidding me????? How bout, IM SORRY FOR CALLING YOU 16 TIMES AND LEAVING YOU A TWO MINUTE VOICEMAIL OF MYSELF THROWING UP.
Found my id. It was in the cats litter box. Seriously what was last night.
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I've now spilled wine and got poptarts all over my cast. So much for my doc taking me seriously...
Anddon't worry about me I have my Darth Vader flashlight
new dating motto: let your guard down, not your panties
I saw his new girlfriend. She was flashing people, short and kinda chubby. I was happy with my life after that.
I was just seen throwin up on the bookstore building near a trashcan by parents. Naturally I throw a thumbs up and say go college
saying im screwed is like saying the titanic took on a little water.
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